I am an Addict--but I am on the Road to Recovery

I finally concluded I am an addict. I am addicted to food and the way it makes me feel. It is my comforter when I have a bad day at work. I cling to it when my family life is out of order. I use it as an outlet because it makes me feel good. My drug of choice is FOOD.

For years, my weight wasn't an issue. After I got married, I became more relaxed, maybe even lackadaisical. I was cooking more and not being as active as I use to; trying to be a good wife. Or at least being the kind of wife others told me I should be. My life changed and it was all about my husband and the children. I didn’t take care of myself. My wants and needs were never a priority. As long as I made sure everyone around me was taken care of, I was content. Food became my hobby but I didn’t realize it until recently. I think it was a form of escapism from being defined as just a wife and mother. I believe in order for me to beat this I have to first figure out how I got here and not make the same mistakes. Then find a solution and execute it. My emotional well being plays a huge part in my physical well being. If I am unbalanced emotionally, everything else is going to be unbalanced. My weight issue is basically mind over matter. When my mind is right, I can tackle any issue as well as this one. I pride myself in being a strong willed person and when I set my mind to it; I do it. I know I can get my weight under control. This issue, just like any other thing else I face in life, is going to take patience and dedication.

God blessed us all with one body. If we don’t take the time to treat it like a prized possession, it will only give back to us, what we put into. It is my responsibility to be respectful of my temple. Just like I don’t abuse it with drugs or over indulge in alcohol; I can’t abuse it with unhealthy foods. I am on a journey to living a healthier life because I owe it to my body, mind and spirit.

Blogging is Therapy

It's been a while since I have updated my blog. I lost my desire to write. I don't know the main reason, it could a combination of things, but nevertheless, my desire disappeared for a while. But I am back.

One of my biggest issues right now is my weight. I can't complain or make excuses because I haven't been consistent with my work out plans. I have also fallen back into old habits of not eating healthy. This is such a hard habit to kick. I have been battling weight issues on and off for almost eight years and enough is enough. My current weight is the most I have been without being pregnant. I weigh three pounds less than I did the day I gave birth to my son five years ago. I will no longer continue with my bad habits. It's hard to cut out things that I enjoy eating which are definitely not good for me, but this has to stop.

I have decided to blog daily about my transition into a more healthy lifestyle. Even if no one reads my entries, this will be my outlet. Blogging has become my therapy.

President Obama and First Lady

I felt so overjoyed last night. I think it trickled over into the morning.

For so many years, our country has been the victim of divisiveness. We have been divided by class, creed, and color. Last night I witnessed this man taking the first step in closing that gap. U-N-I-T-Y is what he seeks AND what we need. We are the human race; nothing else should matter. Racism has been slowly killing America. Prayerfully this election is one of the many antidotes to start the process of elimination for this epidemic.

I pray for the protection of President Elect Barack Obama and his family. I pray for our country to heal from our wounded past. I pray our country is taken into a new and exciting direction lead by this man. I pray we ALL rally together and uplift each other going forward. Anything is possible and last night was prime example of that.
Godspeed.

Black Love is a Beautiful Thing

Beyonce Might Have Some Competition

OMG--this guy knows the entire video and dances almost as good as Beyonce. Almost.
Beyonce is awesome. Many people love to hate on her, but apparently the guy doesn't. He pays homage to B in a HUGE way. It's hilarious!!

Just Bust a Move

I simply love these two! I must say Michelle has a little more rhythm than the Senator, but nevertheless, both have a great sense of humor.

Friendships

I have many friends in my life for many reasons. There’s the friend I can discuss any and every thing with. She never judges and tells me when I am wrong, whether I like it or not. There is my friend, who I always reference as The CIA agent. I have known her for years, but really don’t know much about her private life. I can trust my most intimate secrets with her and never worry about hearing it again. Then there is the positive friend. She always sees the bright side of EVERYTHING. She is always laughing and smiling no matter what. Whenever I am around her, we have the best times together. These women all bring joy to my life. I love them but for so many different reasons.

It feels great to have relationships that grow with you. But what do you do about friendships you feel you have outgrown? The conversations and interactions become more infrequent. The only thing you feel you have in common with your friend is the years you have shared with her. The distance is obvious, but you continue to hold on; afraid to let go of something you know is going nowhere. How do you handle this issue? Do you have the dreaded conversation with your friend and express your feelings? Or do you just continue to distance yourself from her?